Thursday, October 8, 2009

My Happy Place

So I have officially talked Greg into spending some of fall break in Utah. I would go there for several weeks every summer when I was growing up. I love Grandma Tudy's house. . . It is my happy place! I can't wait to take our little family up there and experience the "Fall". No offense Arizona natives. . . but Fall is not a strong sales point for Arizona. We are going to hit a theme park, go hiking, temple square, fall festivals, and play!

I really need to get out of here and just count my blessings. I have so many. It is just really hard not to be consumed with thoughts about Ethan right now. I don't want the memories to fade, but I do want the aching for him to decrease. It is hard to be focused on my other kiddos. I know that feeling will come and go for a long time. I have heard from a few that it takes about 2 years (ouch). I hope its not quite that long before the sting lessens. But I think new scenery couldn't hurt.

This week Cannon turned 4! Wow. We hit Peter Piper and had a blast. It was good to have a party for him. But I couldn't stop thinking I will never do that for Ethan. It is so terrible. I couldn't just enjoy the moment. I know time will help. And I am sooooo grateful to know Ethan is where he can't hurt anymore and that WE WILL be TOGETHER again.

Happy Fall-
Heidi

9 comments:

The Gerard Family said...

Have fun Heidi, you so much deserve it and I heard Utah is gorgeous at this time of the year, actually year round, but you enjoy yourself and I have been praying for you through all of this...hang in there my friend!!

Sandi said...

Oh you guys are going to have so much fun!! I love it up there! Wish we were goin too! Give your mom and grandma hugs from us! And I'm sure your precious STAR will be watching over you guys! xoxo

Lacey said...

So your coming to visit us here in cold Utah? It will be so good for the whole family to get away for a while.

The Ridgway Family said...

It was so nice to have you and Gregg with us last night Heidi, although we don't like getting new members :( As we talked about last night, Disneyland was definitely our happy place and what a difference it made for our little family this entire last year. I hope you have a great time in Utah and try to enjoy yourself. It's so hard, I know, but the sting will lessen and moments will become sweet once again!

Keisa

Ryan and Shannan Hoffman said...

We'd love to see you guys but only if you have time. :) It's beautiful here right now. If you have time, you should drive the Alpine Loop, from American Fork Canyon to Provo. It's beautiful!

Anonymous said...

Heidi, you will love Utah right now. Dress warm,you az natives will be cold!! The leaves are changing and theres LOTS of fall activities going on right now! I guess its true,you always want what you cant have. I would love to be in Az all of Utah's winter!!!Hope you guys have a good trip.

Hot Diggity Daws said...

Have a great time in Utah. I haven't seen FALL in FOREVER, say hello for me.

Sending our love. I am sure a trip will be good for you. I will keep praying for you!

Leigh said...

I've been thinking about you tons lately. I feel like a terrible cousin. Have a great time in Utah, I'm so jealous! I'll call you when you get back.

Avery said...

Good for you.. have fun! Thinkikng of you always..